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In the previous segment, we discussed the source of power: choice.
Now we’ll discuss how to move forward with choice despite feelings of fear or hopelessness.
How to beat feelings of fear and hopelessness
In moments of intense feelings:
- Notice the feeling.
- Feel it in your body. Where is it? What is the sensation?
- Accept the feeling.
- Speak the feeling.
- Experience the feeling.
- As you continue this, the feeling will dissipate.
- Act anyway.
For example, I:
- Feel fear in my chest, with tightness in my chest and stomach, rapid heart rate, a breathless felling, a sense of excitement and agitation.
- Accept the fear.
- Say “I’m afraid I’ll perform poorly”, or “I’m afraid it won’t work”, or “I’m afraid we could fail”.
- Feel it again.
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
–Franklin D. Roosevelt
How to choose power
Some will say they can’t choose until they believe. It’s not worth getting hopes up, like that darn fish who couldn’t ride a bicycle, even if he wanted to.
Thank goodness, belief is malleable.
There are things about which we have no direct evidence, yet we believe.
In many of those places, we simply heard a message so many times it became obvious as the way it is, with little or no objective evidence. In others, it’s a convenience explanation for a difficult problem or piece of evidence.
- The right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness
- The power of the almighty US dollar
There is plenty of evidence, and there are plenty of people, who argue against every one of the above. However there are plenty of other people who know these things to be true and worthy and just, worth living and even dying for.
One way to belief is preparation
Prepare by visualizing success. Clearly define your intended outcome, and devise a plan to create it.
Get your “Clear Direction” Planning Guide.
Another way to belief is repetition of affirmations
There’s an understanding in marketing that it takes several exposures to create interest and several more to create a buying impulse.
There’s a practice in performance that we visualize an outcome repeatedly and it improves our ability to deliver that outcome.
Behind each of these is the idea that when we hear a message enough times, we begin to get comfortable with it, internalize it, and even believe it. As a result, it becomes a catalyst for successful action.
- Even if we invented it out of thin air.
- Even if there’s no objective evidence for it.
- Even if we only say it silently to ourselves.
- Over time it becomes a rule.
- Eventually it becomes an unbreakable law.
Recap of this lesson:
- Power is a choice
- Lack of power is a choice
- High achievers choose power in their areas of achievement
- Claim your power despite fear
- Overcome fear in the moment
- Act despite fear
- Now you have a written commitment you made to yourself to act despite fear.
For more information
- How I climbed a 3,000-foot vertical cliff — without ropes | Alex Honnold
- Overcome fear: Christian Mickelsen Instant Miracle Peace Process
- Why comfort will ruin your life | Bill Eckstrom | TEDxUniversityofNevada
- The secret to self control | Jonathan Bricker | TEDxRainier
- 7 Habits of Highly Effective People – Self Improvement by Stephen Covey
- John D. Rockefeller and his wife (Laura) believed God intended for them to be rich. He died the wealthiest man on the planet.
- “when people wake up expecting to have a stressful day, well, that’s exactly what they get — but it happens because of that mindset.” Can You Really Wake Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed? Science Says It’s A Legit Thing
- Franklin D. Roosevelt: By FDR Presidential Library & Museum – CT 09-109(1), CC BY 2.0, Link
- Alex Honnold: By Niccolò Caranti – Own work, CC BY-SA 3.0, Link
- John D. Rockefeller: By The Rockefeller Archive Center, Public Domain, Link
Also published on Medium.